He Says: Everyone’s A Little Bit Krazy

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Dear Not Krazy About Kinky;

You need to chose now. Do you want to spend the rest of your life living a shallow comfortable life? Do you want you social life to revolve around posting selfies of yourself in front of disaster areas where people were injured and possibly killed? Do you want to never work again because you are getting 50% of your ex-husbands income? Or do you want to die alone with 37 cats?

You have a great chance here to secure your future. Go with the flow long enough to get married, get divorced and get half of everything this rich pretty boy has got.

You’re a virgin. He’s into kinky sex. Perfect. All you have to do is let him ass fuck you and you’ll still be a virgin. I don’t know the reason you are still a virgin but this method works. There are multitudes of Purity Ring wearing Christian girls wanting to be virgins when they get married who can attest to you that giving a blow job while another man fucks you in the ass is not “sex” and you are still a virgin.

Anal sex, blow jobs, hand jobs, dildos and vibratos, fucking other women. You can do all those things and still be a virgin so long as no cock goes inside your cunt.

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Even if you have had cock in your cunt you can still be a virgin. You can become a Born Again Virgin for only $29.95 with free shipping to any place in the world. It’s easy to do and he will never know the difference. Boys are all dumb anyhow. All they do is math, science and engineering. They don’t know anything about nail polish or Sex In The City or who Taylor Swift is dating this week.

Of course you don’t actually have to have sex with him to get half of everything he owns. As you said he is rich, has a nice car, owns his house and he’s sexy as hell. I’m sure you are the only woman alive he is sexually interested in. We all know that powerful rich men like Bill Clinton, Bill Cosby, Tiger Woods and so forth only have sex with one woman. Ever. In their whole lives.

Rich powerful sexy men never have sex with multiple women. The fact that he has selected you out of the 3.5 billion women on Earth tells me that you are worthy of such a man and you probably don’t need to concern yourself with actually putting out. I’m sure he can be convinced to wait until after the marriage for sex. They you need only have a headache every night until you enlist the services of a divorce lawyer.

Don’t worry about him getting impatient. Take a look at your Instagram feed to remind yourself of what a great catch you are. Selfie after selfie after selfie of you making duck lips while dressed liked a whore. What man could turn down a sophisticated woman of the world such as yourself? You have nothing to worry about.

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Your best option is to keep stringing him along. Most likely he isn’t really interested in sex anyhow. He’s probably just a beta male who wants to be your BFF. All this talk is just a cover for how insecure he is about his sexuality. He is probably terrified of a strong independent woman like you. That’s why he is hiding behind all those sex toys and handcuffs.

Most likely he can’t even get it up you intimidate him so much.

Don’t stress your pretty little head over all this. Keep seeing this guy and get him to spend more money on you. Everyone knows you are the centre of the universe. Everyone except him that is. Once he understands you are all that you’ll need never worry about him wanting sex again as he will realize just how far out of his league you are.

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