Unsolicited Advice: She Says Make Parenting a Priority

zparenting

Dear Bad Parent(s),

I have a question for you: When did you decide that parenting wasn’t high on your priority list?  I have another question: Where did you EVER get the notion that it was a good idea to leave two little girls to their own devices in a BAR? And yet another: At what point did you make the decision that getting drunk was OK in this situation? You obviously forgot your responsibilities for the day. How embarrassing. You SHOULD be embarrassed. You did what was easy for you that day, not what was right.

WHO DO YOU THINK IS RAISING YOUR CHILDREN?  THE ENTIRE BAR? THE STAFF AT THE RESTAURANT? ANYONE BUT YOU?

It looked to me like you have decided that your little girls are at the age where it is time for them to raise themselves. Forget age 18, at age 5 it is high time for them to take their own lives into their hands and find their way in the world, right? WRONG WRONG WRONG.

I am going to come right out and say it. You are selfish parents and put your children at risk that day, not just from a possible kidnapping, but also a risk that they will be complete selfish assholes when they grow up.

Children’s brains are like sponges. Do you know that from birth to age 10 is when we (as in humans) solidify our learned behavior and retain the most information?

Lessons taught to your young girls that day:

1. It is OK to damage other peoples property.

2. If you make a lot of noise, it doesn’t bother people around you.

3.  All food is fair game no matter who may want some.

4. Everything is about “me” and what “I want.”

5. Nobody cares what I do so I might as well do whatever I want.

textchild

You have come to a point where you are avoiding responsibility. 

I have to wonder if you use excuses for your child’s behavior in sticky situations. Do you play the blame game? Point fingers at everyone and everything but yourselves?  Do you have a “kids will be kids” attitude? Was this how you were raised? I hope not.

I feel like parenting has certainly changed from when I was a youngster, AND I feel like parenting is now a touchy subject. There are theories as to what is right, and what is wrong. To spank, or not to spank? That is the question. Sometimes I think the parents need a good spanking, or a time out to think about what they’ve done. I think that is what should have happened that day at the restaurant. Parents have a hard time saying “no;” and instead of discipline, they reason with their children. I’ve seen parents make deals with their children for good behavior or, they just simply let things be. YOUR CHILDREN LOSE RESPECT FOR YOU WHEN THIS HAPPENS. When you let your child get away with whatever they want, why should they listen to you when you finally decide to correct their behavior? You have already lost control.

The control is lost and you let it happen. So you sit idly by, drinking your mimosa, KNOWING that no one will say anything to you about your children. No one would DARE come up to you and tell you to correct your child’s behavior. Why? BECAUSE PARENTING IS SUCH A TOUCHY SUBJECT. That’s why everyone in that restaurant, including myself, just watched it happen, frankly too stunned to know what to do. I hate to break it to you, and I really mean this, but if you didn’t pay attention the first time, IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY. The end. No questions asked. No one should have to tell you to correct your child’s behavior. Not only that, this behavior was encouraged because it was so “cute” that you felt the need to capture it on film and probably post it on Facebook fifty times over.

This one is really easy, and I promise it wont hurt too much to think about… at least watch your children!

You finally decide to watch your kids. They do something wrong, and you need to discipline them Any punishment will be confusing to your kids if they don’t know what they did wrong in the first place. You should use discipline to teach. From what I observed, you are not teaching them what is right or what is wrong. Parents, you are their very first teachers AND the most important teachers in their lives. Always. For life. Not the patrons of the restaurant, nor the management, YOU.

Quick side note: I do think that management should have intervened, or that someone should have said something to the management. As patrons and employees of the restaurant, we let the parents get away with what was happening. Once more though, it is not our responsibility. It is your responsibility (have I said that enough yet?).

zbehaving like you

A Plea:

It’s not too late to step up to the plate. Its not too late to establish some routines and encourage good behavior. Do what is right, not what is easy. Give your children the love and attention they deserve without letting them control you. Find a way of discipline that resonates with your children and teaches them the understanding of right and wrong. Check yourself and your behavior, for children will emulate you because they look up to you (in other words, don’t get drunk in front of your kids). Please ensure their health and safety at all times. They are yours. Keep them well.

 

Check back on Friday for Skippy’s advice. What do you think about Robyn’s advice? Comment below! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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